There are many schools of thought about the key to good relationships, and what relationships should be about. I myself have held a number of beliefs over the years, informed or not. In this post, I’ll attempt to shed some “soft light” (film term-couldn’t resist 😀 ) on the best practices with the Bible as the highest authority, being God’s word and all.
Some time ago, I was in church and I saw this guy who I immediately found attractive. I kept smiling in his direction (after the service y’all), and I was like “God please let him pass by me”. He did, and I could barely restrain myself from smiling like an idiot. He was probably wondering what was going on with the poor sister in the Lord. No big deal, really. I saw him again and actually got to meet him, which felt good for the moment. But afterwards, I felt differently.
It was great for me to have that exchange. To be honest I felt a boost of confidence. But then a little later, I thought to myself, “What next?” I couldn’t go down that road. Like somebody, they like you back, figure things out, see if it works, blah blah. Some people might be thinking, “What’s wrong with that?!” I’m not saying it’s wrong; I’m suggesting that there might be a better way. At least for me.
I feel particularly strongly that I’m not meant for everyone or just anyone. I actually have specific skills, desires, interests, passions, that would be a waste if I’m with the wrong person. So what if he’s a Christian and he’s cute? There are things that are way more important like the kingdom of God… duh duh duhm!
Yes. I’m not overdoing it.
If I had a few years to live, what would I rather be doing? Preaching the gospel, helping people know and experience the love of God, building and discipling young girls into women of the kingdom who know their purpose and have the understanding and power to walk in God’s awesome design for them. If I’d have to exchange this for “love” and marriage, I’d rather be single forever.
This being said, I cannot afford to just wing it when it comes to entering into a relationship with someone. Cannot. I have to be intentional, and so does whoever is interested in me.
In the next couple of posts, I’m going to really get into what Biblical attraction should look like, how intentionality should or could play out, and what comes after that.
P.S. I didn’t include any scriptures in this post, but I’m definitely going to have some references in the next one. And it promises to be a bit longer and more engaging.