How are you doing today? I’d like to share a few things with you that I’m discovering. Do you feel like throwing in the towel right now? Let’s make sure you’re “throwing in” the right thing.
I hate the feeling of being stuck; it’s so overwhelming. Sometimes I get what feels like a panic attack when I feel stuck. It’s like you’re in a room without windows or doors, with no means of escape. Claustrophobia, anyone? When I feel stuck in my life, I usually also feel like giving up, because what else could I do?
Some days I lay my dreams on a proverbial table, and examine them. On the bad days, they look crumpled up, and dead. And I think to myself, “Why am I here?” Then I’m faced with a number of choices, the most prominent being to dump those deadbeat dreams into a bin and shut the lid. On those days, I feel so small. And then I wonder if I heard God wrong somehow. Maybe my part in this story of life is so minuscule, I shouldn’t bother with anything. Did God choose me? Could He have?
I’ve found myself rethinking my ideas about what life is. Push, push, push doesn’t always work. Sometimes you need to realize that the sign on the door reads, “Pull”. And what does that have to do with anything? Let me elaborate.
I used to make so many plans for my life: what I was going to do and who I was going to do it with. Then I learned to submit my plans, ideas, and dreams to God, and trust in His ultimate plan. Some things changed about me. I started giving more of myself to others for no other agenda but the agenda of God’s kingdom – the expression of His love, wisdom, and power to bring about righteousness, peace, and joy. I cared even more, and I was humbled. I was humbled because I saw myself under the light of God’s NESS: as self seeking, and sinful. And at the same time, God’s love worked tremendously in me to make me into His image.
Push, push, push says a lot about us, and what’s behind our actions. Trusting God is this necessary, amazing, and aggravating thing. And when we trust, we don’t always have to push.
Why are we doing what we’re doing? Why this dream, this way? Who are we serving? Is this what God wants? Would it really cost to let go? What would it cost?
And in trying to answer these questions, new ones arise. Who am I? Why am I here? What is the point of all this?
And then we cannot but trace these all the way back to God. God, what do you want from me? Everything?
I should give You everything: all my heart, and soul, and strength. And in doing so, be like You in this world, because I love. Just like You do. Why would I ever want to give up on this?
When I feel truly stuck, I realize that my focus is on the wrong things. This is not to say that focusing on the right things eliminates roadblocks from our paths. But that when our hearts and minds are in the right place, we are free, with no walls to trap us in, because we know whose we are, and who we are, and why we’re here.
“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear…” (1John 4:18)
We are it. We’re exactly who we need to be to become who we need to be, to do what we need to do, because God is able to place His great treasures in us, the earthen vessels. He wants to do so much in us and through us. So much! And much is determined by kingdom things, not the things of this world, which is passing away. Do you feel like giving up? Don’t give up on the right things. And maybe give up on the things that count for little in light of eternity – things that are fighting you for everything you have, but should not give.
Let your dreams be His dreams and let Him show you how beautiful life could be when His thoughts become your thoughts, and His desires, your desires. Let Him open your eyes to the things that count and you’ll never want to look back again. If only we could see clearly the things that count- the things that make for a life well lived. Dear God, could we really be that free?!
God is the one writing this story. It’s a story of mercy, compassion, great love, and power, and we could, each of us, play a part in this recreation. We are not less, but more when we are less. I’m discovering this truth only more clearly. It smells like freedom. So close, I could touch it. So close, we could have it.
What thoughts and plans of yours are preventing you from living an abundant life in Christ? Would you lay down your fears for a real adventure in God? Could you let go of yours in exchange for His?